Just get in there
by Jadeah
Summary: A little Ezio Altair snd Desmond moment. As well as more random moments and skits.
1. Swimming Lessons

Desmond=normal lettering Ezio=_Italic lettering_ Altiar=**Bold lettering** Ezio and Altiar=**_Bold Italic lettering_**

_"Come on it's easy!"_

**"No."**

_"Just get in!"_

**"No."**

_"But I'm sure you'll be fine!"_

**"No."**

_"Altiar, just get in there!"_

**"What part of no don't you understand? I swear we can't be related!"**

_"Just go! I won't let you drown!"_

**"Ezio, the day I go swimming will be the day I surrender to Templars without a fight."**

_"So you'll do it?"_

**"NO!"**

"GAH! Don't you get it? Altiar HATES the water with every fiber of his being! Just get it through your thick ass skull that he won't do it!"

_"Desmond, you aren't helping."_

**"Desmond, thanks for the help."**

"You both are hopeless! How am I your descendent?"

_"Ask Altiar, cause I don't know how I'm related to him."_

**"Haha, very funny."**

"Can we leave now?"

_"No! Not until Altiar gets his fucking ass in the water!"_

**"I refuse to get wet."**

_"Why? Don't want girls to see you wet?"_

**"That's NOT what I mean you useless excuse for life!"**

_"Get your ass in the canel before I throw you in!"_

"Even still you won't be able to."

_"Shut up, Desmond. GET IN THE FUCKING WATER!"_

**"No."**

_"I'll drown you!"_

**"If you could."**

_"You apparently sink like a rock! It couldn't be too hard!"_

**"I do, but I ment good luck getting me in the water."**

"Just let it go."

_"Not until Altiar just swims!"_

**"You'll be standing here for an eternity then."**

_"No I won't."_

**"Why?"**

_"Because I won't let you leave until you get in the water."_

**"You clearly under estimate me."**

"Just stop this. It's a retarded fight."

_**"SHUT UP DESMOND!"**_

"I'd think you'd agree, Altiar."

**"I do. But Ezio won't leave me b_ AHHH!"**

_"Ha, you said it'd be hard!"_

**"Ezio! Get me out of here or I'll have your heart as a throphy!"**

_"How, you'll have to swim to get to me."_

"I'm not related to you two."

**"Get me out of here!"**

_"Swim to the docks."_

**"I can't!"**

**"I'm drowning! ARGHHHBBBRBABDJAAAAAAAAAHHH-!"**

"Ezio, get him out of there!"

_"Fine... _ There. He's out happy now Des_ MAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"_

**"Don't do that again."**

_"Arhhh... that was my crotch you bastard! How am I suppost to have kids now?"_

**"Don't throw me in the water."**

_"Wait! Wait! Don't leave me here!"_

**"And why not?"**

_"I won't leave you if even if I kicked you in the crotch."_

**"Ugh. Fine."**

"Okay, NOW we're leaving."

**"And not throwing me into canels."**

_"Fine. I won't, but you'll never learn!"_

**"I don't care, I never needed to swim before, and I don't have to now."**

_"But_"_

**"Do you want me to kick you again?"**

_"NO..."_

**"Then let me be."**

"Ezio, it's better for you if you just let him go."


	2. Begga Ladies!

Altiar=normal _Begger=Italics _**Ezio=Bold**

_"Please! Just a coin! Or two?"_

"No."

_"But my family is ill!"_

"No."

_"Please, be kind to an old woman!"_

"And please, be kind to a man and leave me the hell alone!"

_"But my family_"_

"Is probably laughing their asses off as they watch you try to mooch money off me."

_"But their ill! Just a coin!"_

"I told you, for the millionth time, NO!"

_"You'd make an old lady very happy!"_

"The question is do I want to make you happy to begin with?"

_"Please, just a coin or two!"_

"Get lost before I throw you down a well."

_"I beg of you, I only need a few coins to help them!"_

"I TOLD YOU NO!"

_"Pl-EEEEAAAAASSSE! PUT ME DOWN! AHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhh..."_

**"I can't believe you actually threw her down a well."**

"Wouldn't you?"

**"You're just evil, you know that Altair?"**

"Yes I do."

**"There shouldn't be any other beg_"**

_"Could you give US coins?"_

_"Please?"_

_"We need them!"_

"I've got NO MONEY TO GIVE YOU!"

_"Please we need the money!"_

"Please leave before you end up like your friend!"

**"SMOKE BOMB!"**

"What the fu- *coughing fit*"

_"*coughing*"_

**"That worked flawlessly."**

"And you call me sick and twisted, Ezio."

**"I know. I give it from you."**


	3. I just don't know

**And out of PURE BOREDOM I give you random skits mania! Congratulations! You win a new chapter of this random fanfic! (FYI, I didn't come up with these, they come from videos and comics on DA I saw. So don't say that I didn't come up with anything. I already know. And the list is kind of long to site it all. But if you ask, I'll tell you.)**

Altair: And what is this you Italians call "wuv"?  
>Ezio: Surely is says "love"?<br>Altair: No! "Wuv" with a W! Behold! *hold a sweetheart candy*  
>Ezio: THE CONCEPT OF WUV CONFUSES AND IMFURIATES US!<p>

Ezio: *laying on the grpund* *coughing*  
>Leonardo: Hey, hey guys, he's alive! He's going to be okay! It's a miracle!<br>Cesare: THAT'S NOT A MIRACLE! THIS IS A MIRACLE! *hold a piece of brocolli* Brocolli has twelve easencial vitamins! All lovingly packed into the TINY, GREEN trees! Shame on you!  
>Ezio&amp;Leo: O_O<br>Cesare: SHAME!

Desmond: *singing* Oooohhhhh! Waffles time, it's waffles time, will you have some waffles of mine! *holding waffles to Altair*  
>Altair: For the last time, Desmond, I DON'T KNOW WHAT A WAFFLE IS!<br>Desmond: Altair doesn't like waffles!  
>Lucy: Altair doesn't like waffles?<br>Shaun: Altair doesn't like cookieeeez!  
>Lucy&amp;Shaun&amp;Rebecca: *random talking*<br>Atair: AAAAHHHHHHHHHH! *pointing at Desmond&Lucy&Shaun&Rebecca* I'M SURROUNDED BY IDIOTS!

Ezio: Oh Altair, you're so cold and unfeeling... Yet, I'm here, which means you must have fallen in love at some point and had a family right?  
>Altair: Of course not, Ezio! Don't be disgusting!<br>Ezio: But then how could_.  
>Altair: Alright Ezio, shut up and I'll explain! Okay, once I figured out that I couldn't reproduce by budding, I had to find another way to produce offspring that would look exactly like me! Unforchanately for me, that ment I had to get a woman envolved. Now listen closely fag...<br>Desmond: And now it's time to go into one of Altair's life lessons.  
>Altair: First off, you have to get a female, they are the ones in those dress things. Ones that do not scream are preferred.<br>Woman: LET GO OF ME!  
>Altair: *throws woman on the ground* And then you throw her on the ground, anywhere is fine as long as you don't let her get up.<br>Woman: OW!  
>Altair: Next, you just want to let your primal instints take over.<br>Desmond: Phhsss... Altair's primal instint is to inflict the most pain as possible on the nearest individual.  
>Altair: *stomps on woman's face*<br>Woman: *suddenly gives birth*  
>Baby: *goes flying away* WEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!<br>Ezio: D:  
>Altair: It didn't matter if the woman was pregant or not. My awesomeness was enough to produce an instant clone. The ones that survived the fall were the ones to carry on my lineage. *close up* I'm pretty sure you hit your head on a flower cart when you landed.<p>

Guard: Are you hiding here?  
>Ezio: O_O No.<br>Guard: Oh... Okay. Sorry. Bye!  
>Ezio: *stands in teh haystack* -_- Idiot.<p>

Bartolomeo: YOU STEAL A MAN'S WIFE! THEN GO HIDE INSIDE A FORTRICE!  
>Ezio: _<br>Bartolomeo: Nothing hangs between your theighs!  
>Ezio: OuO What?<br>Bartolomeo: In fact, there is a hole there! So deep, it reaches into the maledetto inferno!  
>Ezio: *falling over laughing* xD Dio Mio!<br>Bartolomeo: o_o Wh... What are you doing down there Auditore?  
>Ezio: *on the ground still laughing* BWAHAHAHAHA! A... A hole?<p>

Leonardo: *staring at a codex page* I can't think straight.  
>Ezio: That's because you're gay.<br>Ezio&Leo: :D

Rebecca: Sometimes I feel people don't "get" me.  
>Lucy: Translation: I'm feeling quite emotionally unpleasant at this moment.<br>Rebecca: I feel like a steriotype... but I'm more like a mix of sterotypes.  
>Lucy: Translation: I really don't like myself. I want to go die.<br>Rebecca: I know I'm a freak, btu I'm satified with the person I am.  
>Lucy: Translation: I'm Frankenstein. I'm going to kill you all and go bound off and marry Edward Cullen.<br>Rebecca: THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID!  
>Lucy: And we'll live happily ever after in a land of pink butterflies and rainbows!<p>

Muliam: Did you do your job? ... -_-'  
>Altair: What?<br>Muliam: NOVICE! :( Did you stop the target?  
>Altair: You mean teh merchant? Oh yes! XD<br>Muliam: arrogent and stupid.  
>Altair: Me? Why?<br>Muliam: Do you know what happens now?  
>Altair: No, should I?<br>Muliam: *slams book on Altiar's head* Stupid Novice!  
>Altair: *laying on the ground with the book on his face and head hurting*<p>

Recruit: So what about?  
>Woman: *uninterested*<br>Ezio: *see the recruit* ! *comes up behind the recruit* APPRENTICE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!  
>Recruit: *goes white*<br>Ezio: QUICKLY GO TO LEARN!  
>Recruit: *runs away*<br>Ezio: *leans against the wall* Buona giornata beela mio.  
>Woman: *lightly fanning self and blushing* It suddenly became so hot.<p>

(Everybodys looking at their own pairings and shippings)  
>Desmond: O_O<br>Lucy: That's it. I'm becoming a nun.  
>Rebecca: Why am I ALWAYS paired with dickless Shaun?<br>Shaun: O_o *thinking* Shit! I scored!  
>Ezio: *hunting down the slash fangirls responcible* When I get my hands on them_.<br>Altair: *is cutting teh computer in half with his sword*  
>Leonardo: I know I'm gay, but I'm NOT a WOMAN!<br>Bartolomeo&Pastilisilla: *backing away from teh computer*  
>Machiavelli: *pointing at the computer* LIES!<br>Cesare: WAPE! WAPE! (translation: RAPE! RAPE!)  
>Claudia: *is on the verge of suicide*<br>Lucrezia: *U*  
>Malik: They are lucky I don't know where they live.<br>La Volpes: *sheilding Claudio's eyes*  
>Male assassin recruits: e_O *eye twitch*<br>Female assassin recruits: :(  
>Cortesant: I'm single then?<br>Maria: *returns to her silence*  
>Theif: I STOLE NO MAN'S VIRGINITY!<br>Mercinary: Why?  
>Guard: *clawing at eyes* AAAAAHHHHHHH!<br>Mario: *being a pimp*  
>Slash fanfgirl: :D<br>Random troll guys: BWHAHAHAHAHA!

Desmond: And that's all. I recommend you go because Altair is on a rampage.  
>Altair: *hits Desmond on teh head, thus knocking him off stage*<p> 


	4. The countless ways to annoy Ezio

And now the MANY ways to annoy Ezio!

1. Steal his money (You WILL get chased)

2. When Ezio catches you and tackles you, shout rape. (works great if you're a girl)

3. Switch his assassin robes with Cesare's clothes.

4. Paint his assassin robes bright hot pink.

5. Ask for a piggyback ride.

6. When he says no, cry and start a scene because he won't.

7. Push him into the guards.

8. Get in a heavily guarded area (or a resticted zone) with him nearby and shout, "ASSASSIN!"

9. Remind him that while the Borgia were massing up to attack Monterriggioni, he was having sex with Caterina.

10. Tell him Machiavelli is looking for him and lock him in a closet.

11. Wait a bit until Machiavelli IS looking for him before letting him out.

12. Play James Bond music while he's sneaking around a resticted area.

13. When he's helping Bartolomeo with the Baron, sing the French Anthum.

14. Replace his Auditore cape with a Borgia cape.

15. Beg him to cook some elaberent meal, then when he does, tell him you aren't hungry.

16. When following him, complain that you need to go to the bathroom, then when he finally stops to allow you to go, stand there a moment and say, "No I'm good now."

17. Chant "LEAP OF FAITH" When he's about to jump into a hay bale.

18. During a leap of faith, replace the hay with rocks.

19. Ask him to play needle in a hay stack.

20. When with him on a war machine mission, alert the guards and take the plans.

21. When he asks for the plans so he can burn them, tell him that you NEED them for your plans.

22. Take his weapons and push him into a brute.

23. Ask him what the point of a ponytail is to a MAN.

24. Steal his good armor and weapons, or break them.

25. Throw him over one of the seven hills of Rome.

26. With everyhting he tells you shout, "LIAR!"

27. Hug his leg and whine, "Please don't go!"

28. Ask him after killing a guard or two if he's ever commited murder.

29. Close down all the banks he DOES own, and force him to go to the one he doesn't when he needs a loan.

30. WHen he asked that one bank for a loan, ask the bank to check his criminal record.

31. Ask every few seconds, "Are we there yet?"

32. Show him all the slash fanfics envolving him.

33. Replace his clothes with Machiavelli's. (two in one!)

34. Sing "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves" or any other loop you can think of.

35. Push him into Cesare just right so they actidentally kiss.

36. Lock him and Cesare in a closet together.

37. While the assassins are away, take the assassin bannors from the hideout and replace them with Templar bannors.

38. Sing Teach me how to dugee

39. When he tells you that he doesn't know how or what "dugee" is cry and tell a guard he yelled at you.

40. On a gondella, sing romance songs.

41. Ask him to teach you how to swim.

42. If he decides to, then be as reluctant as you can to get in the water.

43. Make him listen to Justan Beiber music. (It'll drive anyone insane)

44. With every girl he hits on, slap him across the face and shout, "I thought you LOVED me!"

45. Tell the fangirls his location.

46. Tell the gay YAOI fanguys his location.

47. Stare at him without blinking, and when he does shout, "I WIN!"

48. Ask him if he knows the grind, and when he says no, get really close and tell him that you'll teach him. (Bonus if you're a guy!)

49. Ask if he has any kids from one of the countless women he's laid.

50. WHen eh asks you if you have a life and if you'll leave him alone, shake your head and hug him saying, "I WUV YOU!"

If you aren't dead by the time you've done all of these, then you might wanna run.


	5. Ezio and Altair's chat WARNING F BOMBS

"Hey Ezio?"

"What is it Altair?"

"You're old."

Ezio balled his hand into a fist, "I'm not that old!"

"You are!"

"Well this is coming from the man who didn't live nearly as long!"

"And that is coming from the man who need my codex pages to help find out how to preform a ledge assassination."

"I didn't know about it!"

"Suuuure."

"Do you want another scar on that lip of yours?"

"Do YOU still want to have KIDS?"

"Do fuck yourself."

"You'd like that."

"Just go away!"

"NEVAH!"

O_o "There's something not right with you."

"What do you mean?"

"Maybe it's because you're Arab."

Altair growled. "Pick on Arabs again! I dare you!"

"Well we got siffilis because of an ARAB man having sex with his sheep. What does that tell you?"

"Yeah well... Italians are... just WEAK!"

"You can't come up with anything can you?"

Altair flipped Ezio off. "Old fucker."

"You sound like Cesare now."

"How would I sound like HIM?"

"You are saying the very same insult he always used for me."

Altair laughed.

"What?"

"He called you old! And because that comes from someone of YOUR time period it MUST be true!"

"And you're a phycopathic man who has a blade itch and stabs every last man he sees that gets under his skin."

"I do not!"

"Hey ALtair can I borrow_"

"NO!" Stabs the random man.

"Yup Altair, you REALLY have 'selfcontrol'"

"Fuck off."

"Go screw a goat."

"You screw horses."

"Like you do pigs."

"And you get down with chickens."

"..."

"HA! You can't even come up with a comeback!"

"At least I have charm."

"Hey! I've gotten girls before!"

"One."

"Hey! Maria was tough!"

"Yes, and so was Cristina. And I've had plenty more than her."

"Where do you spend your time, old man? The whore house?"

"No, girls BREAK DOWN MY door for me."

"Correction, the BROKE down your door. Now they don't because you're OLD!"

"I'm not that old!"

"Fifthies, Ezio. That's old!"

"Bah, go back to Malik, I'm sure he'll be happy to see his bitch returned."

"And I'm sure your little friend, Leonardo, will be happy to see you naked."

"Fuck you."

"You'd like it."

"You're one sick and twisted man, Altair. You know that?"

TuT "And now you know where you get it from."

"I'm not nearly as bad!"

"Right because you're a whore."

"Hey! Just because I took advise from a madiam at a bruffle doesn't mean that!"

"Right, you just wanted to know all the right spots to hit."

"Did not! She was teching me_"

"How to fuck."

"How to survive!"

"How are you my descendant?"

"How are you my anciestor?"

"Well first I met up with Maria at the top of the tower and we then begun to_"

"Cazzo! I don't want to hear it! You're such an insane bastard."

"I know." u


	6. Uh Ezio?

Ezio: *naked in the streets* *throws hands up in the air, singing* I JUST HAD SEEX! AND IT FELT SO GOOOD!

Altair: We aren't related.

Desmond: *facepalm*

Lucy: Uhhhhhh...

Rebecca: *laughing on the ground*

Shaun: *died of laugher*

Malik: -_-; Who'd he do it with?

Al Muliam: Your mom.

Malik: O_O

Leonardo: *blushing* EZIO!

Cesare: WAPE! WAPE! (translation: RAPE! RAPE! (sounding like Elmer Thud))

Rodigo: *jacking off*

Lucrezia: *completely turned on*

Claudia: *covering eyes* DAMN IT EZIO!

Maria (Ezio's mom): Son, put some clothes on!

Maria (Altair's wife): How come YOU don't run around the streets like that?

Altair: ummmmm... Do you want an honest answer to that?

Kadar: WTF?

La Volpe: With whome, dare I ask.

Machiavelli: Why. Do. I. Bother?

Cristina: Ezio! Y-you had sex without me?

Caterina: *flips Cristina off* Suck on that bitch!

Vidic: *pervy smile*


	7. Forgive me?

**Altair attempts to apoligize 1, with Ezio's help.**

Altair: Hey Malik?

Malik: *glaring* What is it?

Altair: I just wanted to say... *reads the palm of his hand* that... I'm surray_? Damn it Ezio! You useless decendant! I can't read this curly handwriting!

Ezio: *grabs Altair by the wrist and reads aloud* Altair would like to say that he's SORRY for causing the death of your brother as well as the lose of your arm. *lets go of Altair's wrist*

Malik: And you need to write it down to tell me this?

Altair: yeees...?

Malik: *throws ink in Altairs eyes*

Altair: AHHHHH! *trying to rub out the ink*

Malik: *slams a book on his head*

Altair: *KO*

Malik: Useless excuse for a novice.

Ezio: OwO *shimmies away*

* * *

><p><strong>Altair attempts to apoligize 2, Leonardo's help.<strong>

Malik: *climbs through the entrance of the brureo* *finds a letter* *reads it*

Letter: Dear Malik, I'm very sorry for causing the lose of your brother, Kadar, and your arm. Please forgive me.

Altair: *hiding behind a wall while watching* *turns away to sneak of but runs into Malik and stumbles backwards in surprise*

Malik: I KNOW YOUR HANDWRITING NOVICE! THIS IS SOMEONE ELSE'S! *shoves the letter in Altair's mouth forcefully* *stomps away*

Altair: *spits out the letter* Well that worked...

Leonardo: Usually it does.

Altair: You Italians do me NO GOOD.

* * *

><p><strong>Altair attempts to apoligize 3, Claudia's help<strong>.

Malik: *comes into the brureo to find a vase of lillies on his desk* *discovers a card*

Card: Malik, I'm very sorry for what I caused with your brother, as well as your now missing arm. I hope you can forgive me.

Malik: *narrows eyes and replaces the card before moving the vase aside*

Altair: *enters the brureo* Hey Malik! *sees the flowers* So what did you think*

Malik: *ignores*

Altair: Malik?

Malik: *still ignoring*

Altair: *steps closer* Malik?

Malik: *still ignoring*

Altair: *grabs Malik's shoulder* *shaking the shoulder around forcefully* MALIK!

Malik: *STILL ignoring*

Altair: *lets Malik go* *shuffles out*

Malik: *sighs* Altair, if only you knew that I've tried, but I can't. *tearing up before shifting a paper aside to find a drawing* Kadar...


	8. Family Reunion part1

Ezio: It a family reunion! :D

Altair: I'm not going.

Ezio: Why? D:

Altair: -_- Because I have no family.

Ezio: Yes you do! How would you be born if you didn't?

Altair: What part of "Son of No One" do you not understand?

Ezio: The "No One" part. Someone had to of been your dad!

Altair: Well I have no parents.

Ezio: You can bring Maria and join us!

Altair: *gunt* Fine...

* * *

><p>Claudia: Brother you came! :)<p>

Ezio: I wouldn't miss it.

Desmond: Why am I here?

Mario: You are Ezio's decendant aren't you?

Desmond: *sigh* yes... -.-

Maio: Then there you go!

Maria: Altair? Where are we? :(

Altair: A family reunion...

Claudia: I have one question though.

Ezio: What?

Claudia: HOW MANY EZIOS ARE THERE? *n* *points to Ezio as well as two other of different ages*

Ezio (AC2): I was invited.

Ezio (ACRev): And so was I.

Ezio (ACBro): ALTAIR!

Altair: *smirk* Yes?

Ezio (ACBro): Did you invite older me and younger me?

Altair: Maybe I did. What would you do about it?

Ezio (ACBro): We only need one of me!

Altair: Well they ARE part of the family. ;)

Ezio (ACRev): I'm the most recent, I should be here.

Ezio (AC2): Not so fast old man! I'm younger! I should be here!

Ezio (ACBro): Neither of you should be here!

Desmond: *facepalm*

Altair: *has taken a seat on a folding chair and is eating popcorn*

Mario: I've got an idea!

All Ezios: What? *staring at Mario*

Mario: We have a contest to see which Ezio stays!

All Ezios: Va bene (Fine).

Claudia: What would be the first test then?

Altair: *raises hand* Man hunt? Whoever doesn't get found by me wins.

Ezio (ACBro): *flips Altair off* It was your fault to begin with! We aren't being hunted down by you!

Mario: We could have a swimming contest.

Ezio (ACRev): And that should not be a problem.

Ezio (AC2): No it shouldn't.

Claudia: Then let's do this!

**Next one shall be the contests! :3**


	9. Family Reunion part2

Mario: Now, what you have to do is whoever can save Altair first wins!

Altair: WHAT?

Mario: You heard me. *shoves Altair on the boardwalk, and when they get to the edge pushes him in face first*

Altair: *splashing and trying to keep his head above the water* AHHHHHHH! FUCK YOU OLD MAN!

Mario: *grins and pushes Altair out farther with a stick*

Altair: *clutches the stick*

Mario: NO! *wackes Altiar with the stick*

Altair: *returns to drowning*

Mario: GO!

All Ezios: *run into the water (pssss, they're all in swimsuits too. Young Ezio has swimtrunks, middle aged Ezio has a short pair of swimtrunks, and old Ezio has an old man bathingsuit.)*

Desmond: Was this truely nessasary?

Mario: *stands next to Desmond* Yes. It was.

Ezio (AC2): *reaches Altair and tries to grab hold*

Altair: *grabs young Ezio and makes the two of them sink*

Ezio (AC2): *has a death hold and looses air underwater*

Ezio (ACBro): *takes Altair by the hood and starts to drag him toward the shore as well as clutches young Ezio's hood*

Altair: *jumps onto middle aged Ezio, making him drown too*

Ezio (ACRev): *uses a neck pinch, rendering Altair uncountious before dragging him, young and middle aged Ezios back to shore*

Maria (Altair's wife): Are they dead?

Ezio (ACRev): No... Well Altair at least. *leans down and turns the two Ezio's on their stomachs before stomping down on their backs*

Ezio (ACBro&2): *start coughing up water and gasping for air*

Claudia: OwO Where did you learn that?

Ezio (ACRev): Years of practice.

Ezio (ACBro): Yes, years of breaking guards spines! NOW I won't be able to stand up right for weeks! *continues to cough up water*

Ezio (AC2): Fucking hydrophobes! *flops down and continues to cough up water*

Mario: Should we start the next contest?

Maria (Ezio's mom): Let them catch their breath at least. Then we'll see.

Mario: Fine...

Altiar: *still KOed* No... NO Kadar! Not the bucket!

Desmond: So that's why he's afraid of water?

Maria (Alty's wife): Sort of.

Desmond: Why then?

Maria (Alty's wife): I'd tell you... *face darkens* But then I'd have to kill you.

Desmond: O_o

Mario: So old Ezio gets the first point then?

Ezio (ACRev): I believe so.

Ezio from AC Revelations-1  
>Ezio from AC Brotherhood-0<br>Ezio from AC 2-0


	10. Family Reunion part3

Mario: SO are we ready for the next contest?

Ezio (ACBro): We should be, that is if older me won't try brekaing my SPINE again!

Ezio (ACRev): So you'd rather die choking on water?

Ezio (ACBro): No.

Ezio (ACRev): Then there you go.

Desmond: Can I choose the contest this time?

Mario: *grunt* Fine.

Desmond: Alright, so this one is a man hunt.

Altiar: *fist punch* YES!

Desmond: Now the three of you need to track Altiar down and bring him back here. Now he has to be ALIVE also, Ezio.

Ezios (ACBro&2): *incoharent grumbles as they sheath their daggers*

Altiar: Why find me?

Desmond: You ARE the most awesome assassin of all time. Out of the water anyways.

Altiar: Yes.

Desmond: Then this should be easy. Oh and you can't kill any Ezios either. Just an FYI.

Altiar: *whiney voice* Whhhy?

Desmond: Cause you can't. Now go hide.

Altiar: *shuffles into the trees*

Desmond: But you can attack them as long as you don't severly hurt them!

Altiar: *eyes light up* Okay! *bolts into the trees*

All Ezios: *exchange worried glances*

* * *

><p>Mario: GO!<p>

All Ezios: *run into the treeline*

Ezio (ACRev): *switches on Eagle vision and starts to follow Altiar's trail*

Altiar: *crouching in a lowlying branch above old Ezio*

Ezio (ACRev): *following the trail until he reaches a fork in the gold trail* Cazzo. Sneaky bastardo isn't he?

Altiar: *ready's himself to spring* *jumps and knocks old Ezio off his feet*

Ezio (ACRev): MERDA! *tries to kick Altiar off*

Altiar: *wrestles old Ezio down to the ground and headbutts him, knocking him uncountious*

Ezio (ACRev): *KOed*

Altiar: Got that right old man. *jumps into the trees again*

Ezios (ACBro&2): *run in and find old Ezio kncoked out*

Ezio (AC2): Altiar?

Ezio (ACBro): Altiar. We'd be better off splitting up.

Ezio (AC2): Are you so sure?

Ezio (ACBro): I am, we'll cover more ground that way.

Ezio (AC2): But that's what he did! *points at old Ezio* I don't think that separating is such a good idea!

Altiar: *begins to sneak in for a better shot*

Ezio (ACBro): *turns eagle vision on, sees the three trails Altiar made, and turns eagle vision off* He's tricky. But we'll make more progress on our own. Just scream if you see him.

Ezio (AC2): But_!

Ezio (ACBro): You'll be fine trust me.

Ezio (AC2): But, older me, he's_!

Ezio (ACBro): He's wha_? *is tackled*

Altiar: *hits a nerve and stuns middle aged Ezio*

Ezio (AC2): Cazzo!

Altiar: *leaps on young Ezio and presses him to a nearby tree*

Ezio (AC2): *kicks Altiar in the crotch*

Altiar: ARGGGHHHHHHH! *lets go as he collapses*

Ezio (AC2): Did really older me even think of that? *kicks Altiar behind the ear to knock him out*

Ezio (ACBro): *gets up and pushes young Ezio*

Ezio (AC2): Hey!

Ezio (ACBro): Don't think you've won until every enemy is down. *picks up Altiar over his shoulder and begins to trot toward the camp ground*

Ezio (AC2): *tackles middle aged Ezio and grabs Altiar by the back of the robes before dragging him*

Ezio (ACBro): *lundges for Altiar's ankle and makes young Ezio loose his grip*

Ezio (ACRev): *grunts under his breath as he slowly comes to* *begins to crawl toward the two quarreling Ezios*

Ezio (ACBro): *scrambles up, actidentally kicking old Ezio in the head*

Ezio (ACRev): *KOed again*

Ezio (AC2): *grabs Altiar and makes a dash for it*

Ezio (ACBro): *watches young Ezio vanish in to the trees* *looks down at old Ezio* I could still bring someone back. *slings old Ezio over his shoulder* How much armor do I even wear when I'm fifty? I'm HEAVY! *walks back to the camp ground*

Ezio (AC2): *returns with Altiar*

Mario: So young Ezio gets the point. Where are the others?

Ezio (AC2): Back in the woods. I left when middle aged me kicked older me in the head.

Maria (Ezio's mom): What the...?

Ezio (AC2): I don't know.

Ezio from AC Revelations-1  
>Ezio from AC Brotherhood-0<br>Ezio from AC 2-1


	11. Family Reunion part4

Desmond: So who chooses next?

Maria (Alty's wife): Something that won't kill someone.

Desmond: Are you choosing?

Maria (Alty's wife): It's not happening.

Desmond: Any takers?

Altair: *raises hand*

Desmond: Anyone who will come up with an idea that _won't_ kill anyone.

Altair: *lowers hand*

Claudia: *raises hand*

Desmond: Yes Claudia?

Claudia: Why not we see who can defend something the best?

Desmond: Care to be more sepific?

Claudia: Well, we could... *picks up a pinecone* get a few stacks of these for a certain amount and see who can defend theirs the best.

Mario: But from who?

Claudia: Why not you and Altair?

Altair: O_O Why me?

Claudia: Says the grand master assassin.

Altair: Fine...

Ezio (ACBro): This one should be easy.

Ezio (ACRev): Says the younger me who hasn't won as single contest yet.

Ezio (ACBro): Says the older me who was knocked out twice in the last one.

Ezio (ACRev): Says the younger me who caused one of the two times I was uncountious.

Ezio (ACBro): Says the older me who I carried all the way back.

Ezio (ACRev): Says the younger me who I pulled out of the water and forced to cough up half the lake.

Ezio (ACBro): *opens mouth to say something but closes it*

Ezio (ACRev): *victorious smirk*

Mario: If you two are finished, let's get this one ready.

* * *

><p>All Ezios: *standing ready in front of indiviual piles of pinecones*<p>

Mario&Altair: *getting ready to run*

Claudia: GO!

Mario&Altair: *bolt to the nearest piles and try to snatch pinecones*

Ezio (AC2): *shoves Mario away and into middle aged Ezio*

Ezio (ACBro): *hits Mario in the head and takes the pinecones dropped*

Altair: *snatchs a few of old Ezio's pinecones before running to take some of middle aged Ezio's*

Ezio (ACBro): *kicks Altair in the stomach*

Altair: *drops the pinecones as he clutchs his stomach*

Ezio (ACBro): *picks up the pinecones and dismissively adds them to his pile*

Mario: *tries to reach into the pile from where he's laying*

Ezio (ACBro): *kicks Mario's hand away*

Claudia: Do you think two people were enough?

Altair: *regains himself* This wasn't fair at all. Can't we all just try and steal their pinecones?

Mario: This has turned out to be impossibly stupid.

Claudia: *crosses arms pouting* You say that only because you didn't think of it first!

Mario: No, this is genianly stupid. *gets up*

Maria (Ezio's mom): So does this count?

Mario: *serious face* no.

Ezio (ACBro): Is EVERYONE here against me?

Everyone: *pretend to ignore middle aged Ezio's question*

Ezio (ACBro): Then what should it be?

Altair: I know. NOW we have the man hunt in reverse, I find you idiots.

All Ezios: *agree*

Altair: YESS!

Desmond: Ohhh boy...

* * *

><p>Mario: GO!<p>

All Ezios: *run into the treeline*

Altair: Let's get this straight. Mario, you go after the oldest Ezio, Desmond you've got youngest. I've got the middle aged Ezio.

Desmond: Do they know we're in the man hunt too?

Altair: Noooo...

Mario: Doesn't that give the Ezio you're going after the advantage?

Altair: The objective was to get your prosuer. Since we have set our targets before hand, we know who will win in the end. If they attack the wrong person and bring them back, they are out. Which ever one of us who was brought back will be replaced by the other guy if we can't continue. Got it?

Mario: Alright.

Desmond: Sure.

Altair: Let's go then!

Ezio from AC Revelations-1  
>Ezio from AC Brotherhood-0<br>Ezio from AC 2-1

**That first contest they had didn't count... Pour middle aged Ezio. The man hunt will continue in the next addition of this fanfic! I'll update right away!**


	12. Family Reunion part5

-in the woods with old Ezio-

Ezio (ACRev): *looks around and scales a tree onto a branch* See if you can find me now.

Desmond: *walks in and turns around curiously*

Ezio (ACRev): He's after me?

Desmond: *sighs and leaves*

Ezio (ACRev): I'm not very impressed with his "careful" check of his surroundings.

Mario: *comes up from behind old Ezio* Well he's still your descendant.

Ezio (ACRev): True but st_ *turns around but looses his balance and falls to the gorund*

Mario: *drops down on old Ezio* And clearly you still haven't learned how to servay your own surroundings.

Ezio (ACRev): So you're the one I ahve to avoid?

Mario: *smirk*

Ezio (ACRev): *scrambles up and tackles Mario*

Mario: *grabs old Ezio's neck and finds a nerve to preform a neck pinch, knocking old Ezio out*

Ezio (ACRev): *KO*

Mario: I'm not that impressed, nephew. *picked up Ezio by the ankle and drags him back*

-in the woods with middle aged Ezio-

Altair: *takes a vantage point in the trees* *sees middle aged Ezio*

Ezio (ACBro): *looks up into the trees* *sees a corner of Altair's robe tails* Now where is that Arab coward?

Altair: *clentches hand*

Ezio (ACBro): He's suppost to be finding me? Well clearly he's not doing a very great job.

Altair: *jumps and lands on middle aged Ezio*

Ezio (ACBro): All to predictable.

Altair: Wha_? *is kicked in the stomach and flipped off*

Ezio (ACBro): *gets on top of Altair and pins him down* Do you want to make this easy on yourself and just cooperate, or do you want to make this difficult?

Altair: Neither old man! *struggles*

Ezio (ACBro): *leans down and gets right into Altair's face so they're looking eye to eye* Difficult it is. *positions himself so that his full weight is on Altair and pinches his nose*

Altair: Ahhh! Stop that you useless decendant! This isn't proving anything!

Ezio (ACBro): Are you going to cooperate?

Altair: NO!

Ezio (ACBro): *lets Altairs nose go and grabs both cheeks to stretch them apart*

Altair: Whaaz ares yuz dointh (What are you doing)?

Ezio (ACBro): Well, I apparently can't kill you. So I'm stuck with this.

Altair: Leth mez gos yuz ussleth dethendantz (Let me go you useless descendant)!

Ezio (ACBro): Are you going to cooperate?

Altair: Thine (Fine)!

Ezio (ACBro): *lets Altair's cheeks go and shifts so his weight a slightly off of him* I'm going to let you go, but scream or try to excape and I will knock you cold.

Altair: *rubbing the red marks where Ezio's fingers were* Yes fine! Now get off me before you crack my ribcage!

Ezio (ACBro): *gets off of Altair but quickly holds his hands behind his back so he can't escape* *forces Altair to move forward*

Altair: So what was with acting so childish?

Ezio (ACBro): It worked, didn't it?

Altair: *sigh* yes...

Ezio (ACBro): THen there you go. I do no need to kill if I can simple "convince" them to work with me.

-in the woods with young Ezio-

Ezio (AC2): *hiding in a bush*

Desmond: Here ancestor! Where are you?

Ezio (AC2): *jumps on Demsond*

Desmond: SHIT! *turns and elbows young Ezio in the face accidently*

Ezio (AC2): *nose bleed* MERDA! *punches Desmond in the nose*

Desmond: *nose bleed* Fuck you! *punches Ezio in the stomach*

Ezio (AC2): Eye for an eye! *punches Demsond in the stomach*

Desmond: Makes the whole world blind! *whakes young Ezio upside the head, Koing him*

Ezio (AC2): *KOed*

Desmond: *picks up young Ezio* Should I be worried that it was that easy? *carrys him back*

-back at the camp gorund*

Altair: *gets pushed in by middle aged Ezio* Will you quit doing that?

Ezio (ACBro): Nope. *pushes Altair again*

Mario: So middle aged Ezio gets the point.

Maria (Ezio's mom): I guess so.

Maria (Alty's wife): Altair, did you surrender or what?

Altair: I don't want to talk about it...

Ezio (ACBro): *smiles in victory*

Ezio AC Revelations-1  
>Ezio AC Brotherhood-1<br>Ezio AC 2-1


	13. Family Reunion part6

Mario: So we're at a tie. We'll need to find something to break it.

Maria (Alty's wife): Well maybe it could be a race. Consitering the last two were stealth and hunt, and the first was swimming. *thinks a little more* They could run around the lake I guess.

Ezio (AC2): The WHOLE lake? You must be insane.

Maria (Ezio's mom): *hits young Ezio upside the head* Where's your mannors?

Ezio (AC2): *rubbing the back of his head* T_T;

Mario: It could work. But why not we also have something to make them have to stop. Like we place a few "civilians" in "danger" along the way.

Altair: If you're suggesting that one of them is them trying to save a girl from being raped by me then so help me fu_

Mario: No no. I wasn't. But that's a good idea though. Thanks for bringing it up.

Altair: *facepalm* fuuuuuuuck...

Claudia: You know, why not we have them completely out of character, see who lasts the longest.

All Ezios: *stare at Claudia in both astonishment and annoyance*

Mario: And that could work too. Any ideas for what they could act like?

Desmond: Oh I know! Young Ezio could act gay, middle aged him could act like he's drunk, and old Ezio could act like the styriotypical grandpa.

Ezio (AC2): What_

Ezio (ACBro): The_

Ezio (ACRev): Fuck?

Altair: I second this idea!

Mario: But where would we get the beer for the drunk one?

Desmond: *points to the cooler*

Mario: You brought beer?

Desmond: I need something to take my mind off of you annoying halfwits.

Everyone else: *glares at Demsond*

Desmond: Just saying!

Mario: Alright, besides the point. Let's get this one over with. Starting now!

Ezio (AC2): So I have to be gay now?

Mario: Yes and you loose.

Ezio (AC2): Basta! I wasn't ready!

Mario: *grunt* fine. Starting now!

Ezio (AC2): *fakes a lisp* Alright hotstuff.

Desmond: Okay, I know you dated Cristina and all, but by the slightest chance, are you seriously gay?

Ezio (AC2): Until those over two break character, yes.

Desmond: You've been hanging out with Leonardo too much.

Ezio (ACbro): *simply walks over to the cooler and pulls out a can of beer before drinking it*

Ezio (ACRev): *sits down and motions for one of Altairs kids* Come here, why not I tell you a story.

Altair's kid 1: *causiously steps up to old Ezio* *is pulled onto old Ezio's lap*

Ezio (ACRev): Now have you ever heard the story of your father?

Altair: *pinches the bridge of his nose* Ughhh...

Ezio (ACRev): *smirks at Altair tauntingly*

* * *

><p>-2 hours later-<p>

Ezio (ACBro): *passed out on the grass with a few empty beer cans scattered around him*

Ezio (AC2): *making out with Leonardo*

Ezio (ACRev): *asleep on a lawn chair*

Desmond: They're taking this pretty seriously. Wait! Where did Leonardo Da Vinci come from?

Claudia: Ezio invited him.

Desmond: *eye twitch* And Leonardo just goes along with it?

Claudia: I'm just as shocked as you are.

Maria (Ezio's mom): Should we stop and call it a tie?

Mario: *has taken out the popcorn and is watching contently* What? NO! This is probably the best entertainment I've had since... well I'm not sure if I've been THIS entertained before.

Altair: *kicks middle aged Ezio's hand* Should we be worried?

Desmond: Probably. Or he'll just sleep it off and get a shitty hangover.

Altair: *grabs a big stick* I can assure the headache for you. :)

Desmond: No.

Altair: :( *throws the stick*

Ezio (AC2): *gets hit in the back by the stick* *pushes Leonardo away and looses the lisp* YOU BASTARDO! WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT?

Mario: And so young Ezio is out.

Ezio (AC2): *suddenly realizes what he did and sighes in discontent* Sorry, Leonardo. But you can go now.

Leonardo: *hugs young Ezio before leaving*

Desmond: Was he actually...?

Ezio (AC2): What do you think? I wouldn't have asked if he was straight!

Ezio (ACRev): *wakes up from the shouting* Wait? What just happened?

Ezio (AC2): You're target got away.

Ezio (ACRev): *still half asleep* Merda! *gets up and bolts into the trees before turning back stomping* You little stronzo.

Ezio (AC2): *grins* And now you're out.

Demsond: So middle aged Ezio wins?

Mario: Why not we see how he reacts when he wakes up.

Desmond: If he doesn't have alcohol poisoning that is.

**The winner is undecided. So we'll see how middle aged Ezio will act when he wakes up from his binge drinking.**


	14. Malchik Gay!

Altair: *singing* Malchik Gay!

Malik: Altair, what the hell are you_?

Altair: Malchik Gay! Malchik-Malchik Gay!

Malik: Seriously, what the fu_?

Al Mualim: *singing* Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Malik: *sweat drop*

Al Mualim: Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Altair&Mualim: *throw hands up* Malchik Gay!

Altair: Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay! Malchik-Malchik-Malchik!

Malik: Are you fini_?

Altair: Handsome. soft. tender. Why do you look right through me. think. "no". I can't deny my feelings. Growing, strong. I try to keep believing. Dreaming, on.

Malik: Something's wro_

Al Mualim: And everytime I see you. I crave. more. I want to pull you- *steps closer each time* Closer. Closer. Closer. Closer.

Malik: O_O;

Al Mualim: But you leave me feeling frozen.

Altair: *swaying hips to beat* Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay! I can be! All you need!

Al Mualim: Won't you please! Stay with me! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Altair: Apologies, might-have-beens! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Al Mualim: Can't erase! What I feel! Malchik gay-gay!

Altair&Mualim: Malchik Gay!

Altair: Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Altair&Mualim: *throw hands up again* MALCHIK GAY!

Malik: *disturbed eye twitch*

Al Mualim: *sways hips like Altair* Malchik-Malchik

Altair: Choking. back, emotion. I try to keep on hoping. For a way. A reason for us- both to. come in. close.

Al Mualim: I long for you to hold me. Like your- boyfriend does. And throw my dream- is- slowly- fading.

Altair: I want to be the- Object. Object. Object. Object. Of your passion but it's hopeless.

Malik: *facepalm* You do realize that_

Al Mualim: Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay! I can be! All you need!

Altair: Won't you please- Stay with me! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Al Mualim: Apologies! Might-have-beens! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Altair: Can't erase! What I feel! Malchik gay-gay!

Altair&Mualim: Malchik Gay! *start dancing to the music*

Malik: *slowly backing away*

Altair: *pushes Malik to the wall* Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay! I can be! All you need!

Al Mualim: *pushes Altair off and pins Malik to the wall* Won't you please- Stay with me! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Altair: *throws Al Mualim off and holds Malik back ot the walls* Apologies! Might-have-beens! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Al Mualim: *tackles Altair and presses Malik into the walls some more* Can't erase! What I feel! Malchik gay-gay!

Altair: *attacks Mualim*

Altair&Mualim: Malchik Gay! *practically tearing each other limb from limb*

Malik: *walks away*

Altair: *notices and shouts out* MALCHIK GAY?

Al Mualim: *presses Altair to the floor and calls out too* MALCHIK GAY?

Altair: *forces Mualim off*

Altair&Mualim: MALCHIK GAY! *looks at each other*

Altair: Malchik_

Al Mualim: Malchik_

Altair&Mualim: Malchik gay. Malchik gay. Malchik gay. Malchik gay. Malchik gay. Malchik gay.

Altair: *runs to Malik and tackles him to the floor*

Malik: GET THE FUCK OFF ME NOVIC_!

Altair: Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay! I can be! All you need!

Al Mualim: *kicks Altair off and hold Malik down with his foot* Won't you please- Stay with me! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Altair: *bites Mualim's ankle and pins Malik down again* Apologies! Might-have-beens! Malchik Gay! Malchik Gay!

Al Mualim: *once again kicks Altair off and steps down on Malik's chest* Can't erase! What I feel! Malchik gay-gay!

Altair: MALCHIK GAY! *kicks Al Mualims legs out form under him*

Al Mualim: Malchik Gay!

Altair: Malchik gay!

Al Mualim: Malchik_

Altair: Malchik gay!

Al Mualim: Malchik Gay!

Altair: Malchik gay!

Al Mualim: Malchik Gay!

Altair: Malchik! Malchik!

Al Mualim: Malchik gay.

Malik: GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME! *thrashes around*

Altair: *hits Al Mualim in the head, KOing him*

Al Mualim: *KO*

Altair: Malchik Gay. *kisses Malik*

Malik: nnnnneeeuuuuuuuuuuufffff! *pushes Altair off and runs like hell*

Altair: MALCHIK GAY!

***is staring at my own writing with a twitching eye* I. Don't. Know.  
>This is based on the song Malchik Gay by Tatu. Look it up. Oh, and I added the last two Malchik Gays.<br>P.S. I do not support the AltairXMalik pairing or MualimXMalik, this is just a joke.**


	15. Torture WARNING DESTURBING VISUALS

Ezio: Hey Altair?

Altair: What?

Ezio: With all these criminals in the world, and how they're delt with, have you ever come up with any ways to punish the worst of them?

Altair: *grins* Well, yes I have. Let's say that Malik here was a rapist.

Malik: O_O WHAT?

Altair: He'd be arrested like any of the others. Now let's say I was the punisher or whatever it's called, I'd castrate Malik here so that he'd never screw anyone ever again.

Malik: No you aren't cutting my dick off Altair!

Altair: After that, I'd remove his hands and the tip of his nose.

Malik: Nor are you removing any other part of my body!

Altair: Now, I have all the other prisoners ass rape him.

Malik: HELL NO!

Altair: Once their done, I lash him until his back's in shreds.

Malik: Altair! Put the whip down!

Altair: -_- And I'd finally finish him by breaking every bone in his body then shattering his skull.

Malik: Are you finished?

Ezio: O_o

Altair: What? You asked. Do you think you could do better?

Ezio: Yes I could. Malik would be arrested as you said.

Malik: Why am I your prime example here? I've never raped anyone!

Ezio: Well then I'd bring a lion and have it ass rape him.

Malik: That's beastiality!

Ezio: Exactly. Then I'd string meat around his neck and throw him into the Colloseum to be eaten by five starved lionnesses.

Malik: I will just kill them.

Ezio: How? When I've taken all your weapons?

Malik: Damn it.

Ezio: The lionnesses eat him and he's dead.

Desmond: How about this? We just stick Malik in the electric chair and be done with it.

Malik: A what?

Desmond: It shocks you to death.

Malik: I think I'll go with the desendent here. *points to Desmond*

Ezio: But mine is WAY better.

Altair: You're far too soft on them!

Ezio: NO! You are! Besides, I'm sure it'd hurt more to be ass raped by a lion than a bunch of men!

Altair: *is about to retort but sighs* You've got me there...


	16. Propositions

Ezio: Hey La Volpe?

La Volpe: What? *glances up from a pair of dice*

Ezio: I know something.

La Volpe: And so do I. *rolls the dice*

Ezio: *sly smile* Do you wanna know what I know?

La Volpe: *pays little attention* *sarcastic tone* Oh you know I'd just _love_ to hear it.

Ezio: Sure you would... Gilberto.

La Volpe: O_O *whips around and holds a blade up at Ezio's throat* Okay, what the fuck do you want?

Ezio: *still grinning* What? Me? Nooooo, I couldn't ask anything of you, that would be devious.

La Volpe: I'm not kidding, what the fuck do you want?

Ezio: Wellllllll. You can start by moving this blade away from my neck.

La Volpe: *incoharent grumble* *moves the blade away*

Ezio: Bene. Now let's see... *taps a finger to his chin*

La Volpe: How the hell do you know my first name? I never told you!

Ezio: Oh don't you remember? Back when we first met each other, you told me your name was Gilberto and that I could call you La Volpe.

La Volpe: And all this time, I thought you've forgotten...

Ezio: Hell no! I was waiting until a time like now to bring this back up.

La Volpe: Alright what do you want, stronzo?

Ezio: I'll let you know when I think of something.

La Volpe: *glare*

Ezio: *mistivious grin*

La Volpe: ... *grins back*

Ezio: Why the fuck are you smiling now?

La Volpe: Because. I know what you did last summer.

Ezio: O_O Okay, what do you want?

La Volpe: *toying with his dagger* Well, you keep quiet about my first name, and I remain silent about last summer.

Ezio: -_- *grunt* Fine...

**And FYI, It is a fact that La Volpe's first name is Gilberto. Just that there's a difference in the game and novel. In the game, La Volpe doesn't mention a first name. In the novel, he does. Just felt like seeing something done with this.**


	17. Bored

In a room (the door locked by Rebecca), Altair, Malik, Ezio, Leonardo, Desmond, and Shaun all sat around. Bored beyond bored, none could bring themselves to admit that they were. It was a battle of wits and patience. One of which was lacking in most of them.

Altair was impatiently drumming his fingers on the chair arm.  
>Ezio's leg was vertically shaking as he stared down at the floor.<br>Leonardo couldn't even sit down, he was pacing.  
>And Desmond was as twitchy as his ancestors.<br>But Malik and Shaun seemed calm and relaxed with the silence.  
>Completely, calm.<br>Like nothing was wrong with the heavy quiet that hung over the six like a fog.

Finally, one person breaks the silence. Which is to half of the room's occupants releif.

"What are we doing in here?" Leonardo asked.

Shaun looked to the clearly-bored-out-of-his-usually-busy-mind artist and shrugged. "That git, Rebecca locked the door. We aren't going anywhere for a while."

To his responce, Ezio, Altair, and Desmond all groaned in unisession. They were used to being able to finding something to do. And prior to the silence, Altair had found entertainment in annoying Malik. That ended as soon as he was kicked in the crotch by the pissed off dia. Desmond didn't know what the hell to say to any of these people, and Ezio and Leonardo had a conversation that turned south as soon as Shaun came into it. It went from descussing the Apple to consitering side effects, and then Shaun came in and said it could end up being something like a "gay bomb". That's when Leonardo blushed and got silent, later pacing to get rid of his pimped up energy.

"Shaun, I'm bored." Desmond grunted.

"And what to you expect me to do?" The historian questioned in annoyance.

"Make me unbored." The once bartender answered.

"I have nothing to help you." Shaun responded.

Then Desmond clearly got an idea because he stood up and smiled. "I know what we could do!"

Everyone, except Shaun and Malik, looked up with interest.

"I know a game they did in drama class once where we have to improvise with lines, but in alpebetical order." He explained. "We could play that!"

"Who goes first?" Shaun grumbled.

Desmond shrugged then pointed to Altair. "Altair, I'm starting this game with you. Say a line that starts with the letter A."

"Asshole." Altair responded with a middle finger.

"Alright, so we'll go around the room. Shaun, you're next." Desmond told everyone.

Shaun facepalmed. "Bloody hell, Desmond. What kind of childish game is this?"  
>Desmond pointed to Leonardo. "Can't you be a little opptomistic?"<br>Now it was to Ezio. "Do you honestly expect him to be opptomistic? About anything?"  
>And Desmond. "Everyone will just have to get used to it I guess."<br>He then pointed to a grumpy Malik. "Go away."  
>And it continued in that order. "Hate to break it to you, but we're LOCKED in here."<br>"I don't see why we're still continuing this."  
>"Just what motive do you have for being such a kill joy?"<br>"Kind of hard to be nice when you haven't had any joy in months."

This made Shaun glare at Ezio's underlying insult.

"Let's not fight over this."  
>"Maybe a fight would be more interesting."<br>"Not surprising that you'd think such."  
>"Oh please. You people can't HONESTLY find this game entertaining in any way."<br>"Please stop complaining."  
>"Quit being such a dick, Shaun."<br>"Ranting isn't gonna get us anywhere. But I have to say, this is impressive."  
>"Stupid novices..."<br>"Takes a novice to know one."  
>"Upon my time, you bloody idiots get in a debate on who's the bigger stick in the mud."<br>"Very true."  
>"Why is it that we've somehow made it to 'W'?"<br>"X-rays seem to be better than you people."  
>"You'd think that. But I can still kick your sorry ass."<br>"Zebra's have stripes!"

Everyone but Shaun bursted out in laughter at Altair's random exclaimation.

"We all win."


	18. Horror Movies Part1

"AHHHH! TURN IT OFFF!"

Everyone looked over their shoulders as Leonardo leaped behind the couch when the people in the movie were suddenly attack by a monster. Everyone was so consumed in the movie that they hadn't realized that Malik had left. Altair was the one to discover that Ezio as well had left.

"Looks like my descendant can't handle a movie."

Desmond shrugged, "Who knows. Maybe he just was getting popcorn." He expressed his point more by hold the empty bowl upside down and shaking it.

"Or he's trying to be a bitch and scare us." Altair grunted.

"It wouldn't surprise me." Shaun huffed.

"And Malik? What about him?" Desmond retorted.

Altair glared. "I know Malik is a creep. And I know being an asshole is what he does, so I know it's bound to happen."

"So you wouldn't be scare if he jumped out of nowhere and took you by the shoulders?"

"Not at all."

"RAHHHH!"

"HOLYSWEETMOTHEROFFUCKING-!"

Kadar bursted into laughter on the floor as Altair was clinging to the ceiling. It took poking him with a broom to get the startled Assassin down, and he could seriously cling, consitering he stabbed the ceiling with his hidden blade. When he finally was peeled off, Altair jumped on Kadar and pinned him down.

"And you're the little asshole!"

But who could take him seriously after his being proven wrong, Kadar was laughing like crazy.

Then silence.

Everyone heard it. It was like something was thrown across the room upstairs and shattered on the wasn't long before a scream followed.

Leonardo was in a feedle position now behind the couch, clearly mortified. "Wha-what is that?"

"I don't know." Shaun replied. "Desmond, go check."

"Me?" Desmond was clearly scared.

"Yes you, you git. Go up and see what it is."

"B-but why me?"

"Because if I hear you screaming, I know something is wrong and I can be sure to lock to door." The brit retorted.

Desmond didn't argue anymore, he just walked out and went upstairs. Everyone in the room held their breath.  
>Then they heard Desmond scream, "WHATTHEFUCKISTHATFUCKINGTHING? HOLYJESUSBUTTFUCKING- AHHHHHHH!"<p>

Altair, Kadar, Shaun, and Leonardo all got up and started upstairs. Leonardo was holding a blanket on his shoulders, they came upstairs, they found the kitchen a mess. A few shattered glasses and plates, the table overturned and chairs scattered, one was broken and the leg was used as a projectile (as it was sticking out of the wall). The most unsettling thing? There was blood everywhere! Trails, handprints, splatter, and pools of it!

And there they found Desmond. Curled in on himself in the corner, as he looked dazed into the distance. A trail of blood ran down the corner of his mouth, and his sweatshirt was torn and reddened. They could see the horrible wounds on his sides and back! Whatever had happened, he had been brutilized.

"Desmond? What the hell happened?" Shaun questioned.

The man shuttered. "H-h-he's crazy..."

That was when Lucy opened the door, "What's going on in... here..." She stared jaw dropped at the kitchen. "What the hell just happened?" Rebecca was right behind her.

"Whoa." She then glanced at Shaun, then Desmond. "Alright Shaun, I know you don't like him saying you have a tiny dick, but you didn't need to assualt him."

The brit was taken off guard, "Wha- me? I didn't do this! I swear!"

"No, he was downstairs with the rest of us." Leonardo added.

"Then if Shaun didn't just gore Desmond..." Lucy didn't take her eyes of the still bleeding Desmond. "then who did?"

"H-he's crazy..." Desmond whispered again, shaking like a leaf.

"Who?" Kadar asked him.

Desmond on shut hsi eyes, sighing a breath before he went limp. That was when Lucy shoved Kadar away and started shaking Desmond around like crazy, "Desmond! Desmond! Wake up!" But he continued to lay there limply. Skin paled to almost white. Then she turned with tears in her eyes. Rebecca came instantly with a hand on her shoulder. Lucy choked on a sob. "He's gone..."

"No."

"He's dead..." She whispered.

Kadar glanced at the two and looked back to Desmond, he was dead still. Skin cold. It was true.

"Well then, let's go hunt down the man responcible!" Shaun announced, he was clearly pissed. So was everyone else! They were ready to find this guy and throw him out of a window.

**You remember the family reunion? And how I broke it into parts? Same with this. Enjoy!**


	19. Horror Movies Part2

They all took hold off something to fight with, then broke into groups to search the hideout.  
>Lucy, Altair, and Kadar.<br>And Rebecca, Shaun, and Leonardo.

They needed to also find Malik and Ezio.

Terrific.

* * *

><p>With Lucy, Altair and Kadar! :D<p>

Altair led them to the upper floors of the hideout to search around, following a trail of blood that was bringing them down the hall and to a door. Of course, the door was locked. It took a few minutes, but Altair broke the lock and opened the door, where they found themselves staring in horror at the devisation that was the library. Books were thrown across the room and bloody hand prints were everywhere. It was hard for all three to swallow.

"W-well. Ladies first." Altair nervously chuckled. But he earned a sharp elbow to the ribs.

"Asshole." Lucy mumbled as she walked in. "Let's put the woman in danger. I'm suppost to be the strong man." She added sarcastically. Then she vanished into the shadows, the lights were off.

"Do you see anything?" Kadar asked.

"No. Just pitch black." Lucy called back from inside. "What the-? HOLYSHIT!" Then they heard her hyperventilating in there.

"What is it?" Altair questioned.

"K-Kadar?" Lucy stammered.

"Yes?" He knew he'd regret answering.

"Weren't you suppost to die before Malik?" She responded in horror.

"Wha- what? I guess. But what is it?"

"Come see." She told him.

Kadar entered the room, and Altair followed. When their eyes adjusted to the dark, they could see Lucy kneeling over something. It took a long moment to realize that it was Malik! He too wasn't moving, he was just laying there in a crippled heap.

"Malik!" Kadar exclaimed and shoved Lucy away look at him. His brother's eyes were wide, glazed over and a scowl was frozen to his features. He wasn't breathing, and he couldn't feel a heartbeat. He was dead. He knew he was dead. But why him? "Why?" He whispered.

Altair even didn't hound Kadar for crying. He only sighed, "We should tell the others."

Lucy nodded. "You and Kadar do that, I'll move Malik's body to the bedroom, so we can find it again."

Although Kadar seemed paranoid, and suspitious, he nodded and followed Altair out. Still crying all the way.

* * *

><p>With Rebecca, Shaun, and Leonardo! #3#<p>

While the others went to the upper floors, they followed a separate trail out of the kitchen and through the living room. They eventually came to a closet. Rebebcca looked to Shaun and then Leonardo before turning the knob. She and the others all jumped back as they found Ezio hung from the ceiling by his wrists, robes torn up and neck wounds visible. Everyone just stared in shock, then horror. Leonardo in particular ran off to the corner, which the other two guessed it was to vomit.

"Is he...?" Shaun didn't even complete his sentence.

Rebecca shook her neck. "I'm not feeling a pulse." He removed her fingers from Ezio's neck and whipped the blood on her jeans. "He's dead."

When Leonardo returned, he was crying. It was understandable. They were close friends.

"What do we do?" Shaun asked.

Rebecca sighed. "Go find the others and tell them that we found Ezio's corpes, I guess." Then she looked back to the still hanging body. "I'll cut him down and bring him to the bedroom. At least we'll be able to know where his body is so we can bury him."

"Are you sure? What about the killer?" Leonardo asked.

Rebecca shook her head. "I can handle myself. Just find the others. I'll also take care of Desmond in the other room, alright?"

Both nodded slowly. Shaun then asked, "So you wanna separate? And make it more likely that whatever's in this place is going to attack us because we're in smaller groups?"

She nodded. "Sounds about right to me. And take Leonardo with you, I'm sure he's about to piss himself."

Although the artist was offended for five seconds, he looked down, knowing as well it was probably true. He was scared to easily.

Shaun led Leonardo away, and started to look for the others.

"Hello? Where are you guys?" Shaun called.

Leonardo whispered worried, "What are you doing? Something will get us!"

Shaun rolled his eyes. "Can anyone hear me?"

"Shaun?"

They both sighed in releif when they heard Kadar respond. And soon, everyone stood in the dining room. Half their four person population, Leonardo and Kadar, were crying.

"What did you find?" Altair asked.

"Ezio's dead." Shaun answered. "And you?"

"Malik as well." The man sighed as he pitched the bridge of his nose.

"I don't like this." Shaun murmered. "Everyone's dying and we don't know who's killing them."

Then they heard a shrill scream upstairs! Everyone ran staight up, no hesitations.

**DU DU DUNNNNNNN!  
>What will they find? Who else is dead? These questions will be answered in the next chapter!<strong>


	20. Horror Movies Part3

They all stopped dead in their tracks as they saw Lucy, bloodied and butilized as she limped down the hall, leaning on the walls and holding her side. She was gasping for air. When she looked up and saw them, she started crying, as if all teh tears she had forced back couldn't be held up any longer. That was when she collapsed.

Shaun ran up and flipped her open, "Lucy! Can you hear me? What happened?"

Her gray eyes dull. "I- I saw the thing... It... got... Rebecca..."

Everyone was trembling now, as they heard those words.

"Where were you?" Shaun pressed.

She gasped for breath a moment, shuttering. "In... the bedroom..."

Now it was dead silence. No one said a word. It also sounded like no one was breathing.

Then Leonardo exclaimed, "THEY WERE TAKING THE BODIES TO THE BEDROOM! THE THING MUST BE HIDING THERE! DIOS MIO! OH DIOS MIO!"

It took a whole minute to slap some sense into him, as if he kept up with the screaming, they would be dead for sure.

"What can you tell us about the monster?" Altair asked.

Lucy barely even looked at him as her eyelids flutter a moment, she was forcing them to stay open. "It's blind... But... it's not deaf..."

Everyone took in this information. Then SHaun laid Lucy up against the wall, "You'll be alright. We're going after the thing."

"N-no... you wouldn't stand... a chance..." She muttered her protest. Then she suddenly went limp, laying in a croppled heap on the floor.

Shaun punched the wall.

"We've got to stop this thing!"

"We can't-!"

"I'M GETTING OUT OF HERE!"

"separate..." Kadar finished as Leonardo raced down the stairs. Then they all heard him scream. In record time he was running up the stairs again. Eyes wide with terror and heart racing as he ran right into Altair, practically jumping up into his arms!

"What the-? What was it?" Shaun questioned.

"I don't know!" Leonardo cried. "It was huge! Argh!"

"Will you get off of me?" Altair demanded as he dropped Leonardo.

Shaun then asked, "Did it attack you? Did it even touch you?"

"N-no... I- I don't think it did!" Leonardo answered and he was turning around and trying to look himself over. He was sweating as well. Dispite it being cool aired and making goosebumps raise, he was sweating.

"What did it do to you?" Shaun asked, holding onto his shoulders. He could see Leonardo's eyes were also diolated.

"I- I don't... I don't know..." He then held his head. "Oh dear..." He then fainted. Luckily Shaun caught him.

"That's great... Just great..." Altair grumbled. "People are dying, there are TWO monsters, and now he's fainted."

"At least we know there are two." Kadar responded.

Shaun laid Leonardo down beside Lucy's body. "We should go and kill them then."

"Now."

**Next chapter, they go for the kill!**


	21. Horror Movies Part4

They all got ready, drawing their weapons, and Shaun grabbing a broom because he lacked a weapon. Then they stood in front of the door. Exchanging glances, Altair opened the door and slipped inside. Kadar and Shaun right behind him. It was dark.

As they reached the center, SLAM!

All three jumped and ran to the now closed door, pulling on the knob helplessly as they fought to open it! Until they finally gave up, it was hopeless.

"We're locked in." Kadar murmered. "We're doomed!"

"Will you shut up! The think can hear us!" Altair hissed.

"You bloody gits!" Shaun growled. "Come over here and look at this!"

The two came towards where he was crouching to see Rebecca laying sprawled on the floor in the corner. Completely gored. They could see bones and organs... just horrifing! From the sight, Kadar backed away wide eyed.

"We're fucking dead meat!" He exclaimed. "We're gonna die in here! We should have just got the hell out while we could!"

Altair glared, "Leonardo tried that! Remember? There's another one of these fuckers downstairs! We aren't going anywhere!"

"Then what do we do, huh?" Kadar snapped. "We're trapped in with this thing! And it did that!" He gestured to Rebecca's multilated corpes. "We're only three guys, with swords and a broom! What will that do?"

"We need to calm down before the thing finds out where we are!" Altair snapped.

"Too late!" Shaun screamed.

They looked to the darkness where they saw a large massive figure coming at them! Fast! Nowhere to run, no where to hide, they could only dodge it! The thing was making earpiercing wails and shreatches! And that was enough to stun Shaun, it knocked him over and pinned him down! A smaller human shaped figure kept him down while the monster came after the other two.

Kadar was taken down next, once again a humanly figure pinned him down. Like the first, black as a shadow. He was trapped under it's weight.

And lastly Altair. He was smacked and sent into a wall with a loud thud! He dodged the thing for a little while, until it finally got a hold of him and pressed him into the floor. Another one of those shadowy figures came and held him to the floor.

They screamed for mercy, for help. But they knew that wasn't going to happen. The figures had red bloody liquid dripping down on them, like it was drool. But the crimson color proved otherwise. All of them struggled against the creatures holding them.

And then light!

It was blinding! It took a minute to ajust, but they could hear the hystarical laughing around them. And when they could see, they were staring at the very people they had seen dead! They weren't dead at all! They were right in front of them! Laughing up a storm! Or maybe they themselves were dead.

The shock of it all was too much.  
>Altair fainted.<br>Legitamately out cold.


	22. Horror Movies Conclusion

When Altair woke up, he was on the couch in the den where they were watching the movie in the first place! Everyone was staring at him.

"Am I dead?" He asked dazily.

This made everyone but Shaun and Kadar laugh. They wer laughing at him! At the only others who weren't laughing!

"What the-? Why are you-? What the fuck?" He stammered.

Ezio calmed down enough first to say, "We definately got you three good!"

"Wha'? What do you mean, stupid decendant?" Altair growled as he sat up. A dizzy spell took him and he laid back down another moment.

"You fell for our master prank!" Desmond answered.

Kadar and Shaun looked down to the floor in embarrassment.

"Bu'- but you were dead! And you!" He exclaimed as he pointed to Malik and Ezio. Both were alive and well. "I saw the bood! I saw the wounds!"

Everyone laughed again.

"What you saw, it was fake!" Rebecca cackled.

"You were mutilated! I saw bones and a freaking lung! I know I didn't imagine it!"

"It's called latex." Lucy explained. "We made fake wounds and blood, and everything in advance."

"But you were fine before! How could you have-?"

"We hid the fake wounds under our clothes." Desmond answered. "Do you want to know or not?"

Altair nodded.

Desmond smiled.

"You see, Ezio and Malik went upstairs not long after the movie started. Meanwhile, I and Leonardo were busy trying to keep you from leaving."  
>"When Malik and I went upstairs, we worked on making the scenes in each room. Got disposible identicle furniture that Lucy wouldn't kill us for breaking and throw them around a bit. Even glued a leg to the wall. Then we had fun with fake blood and make a big mess of it. Made it look like we were slaughtering something in there. After we finished, we made trails of fake blood to the rooms we'd pretend to die in, then changed to an extra set of clothes we owned so it looked like we were attacked. I was lucky that thsoe guards seem to like cutting up my clothes when they attack me."<p>

"And what about being dead?" Altair asked. "None of you had a pulse!"

Lucy smiled. "That's where Shakespear has taught us something. We were able to make a drug to have us appear dead. In reality, it just slowed our heartbeats and breathing to the point where we look dead. It was able to put us right into a suspended state of animation."  
>"Yes, I had to hang myself up by the wrists shortly after administering the drug."<p>

"But what about Desmond? We were all there!"

"Simple. When I pushed Kadar out of the way and acted like I was shaking him, I used the drug on him in secret."  
>"Yeah, I never died."<br>"So me and Lucy were sure to split you guys up into groups so you could discover Ezio and Malik's 'bodies'. It was just lucky that Altair and Kadar both went with Lucy. I had Leonardo with me so we could mess with Shaun's head."

"I knew there was something going on!" Shaun stated.

"No you didn't. You were scared shitless like the rest of us." Kadar retorted.

"So me and Rebecca both convinced you guys to meet up, that way we could move Ezio, Malik, and Desmond freely so we could wake them up and begin the next step. I helped Rebecca get changed into her costume while a couple of Ezio's recruits got in the monster disguise. We were also sure to keep the lights low so that you guys would bee less likely to see that the latex gore wasn't real. I can honestly say that Leonardo had some talent with making Rebecca's wounds."  
>"Five hours in advance working on them."<br>"Right. So I also changed, then admistered a lower dose of the drug to myself. I did this so that I could keep moving just a little longer so I could draw you guys upstairs. So I screamed, which worked, and I pretended to be in serious pain and almost dead. That worked pretty well. I was also able to rehearse so I could answer any questions you guys might have."  
>"Then I ran downstairs, pretending to be desperate, then ran back up after screaming and acting pretified."<p>

"But you fainted!" Altair exclaimed.

"I acted like I fainted." Leonardo responded. "When I was sure you left, I woke Lucy up so we could get ready at the door. And once you were inside, we slammed it shut and held it closed."  
>"While you guys were in there, the recruits got to chase you around. Also Ezio, Malik, and Desmond were inside so they could tackle you."<br>"Shaun you were too easy." Desmond laughed. "And how you were begging for me not to eat your face off! Priceless!"  
>"I'm surprised. I thought you were suppost to be the strong, Altair." Malik stated with a grin.<br>"And Kadar, you just couldn't be any easier." Ezio added.

"But-! What?" Shaun stammered.

"While you guys were crying and begging for mercy, the recruits turned on the lights and another woke me up. Which brings us back to the present."

"Why did you do that?" Kadar questioned. "Who were you trying to get?"

Everyone pointed to Altair.

"You could have told us!" Shaun pointed out.

"Nah, your reactions were what we were looking for to avoid Altair from getting suspitious." Rebecca laugh. "We were about to not tell Leonardo, but we realized we'd need him to make the fake wounds. So it was also good that he could act."

Altair growled and got up, stomping out of the room.

"Where are you going?"

"Out." He grunted as he slammed the door behind him. He then went upstairs and curled up in the nearest bed to go to sleep. He would have nightmares for weeks to come.


	23. AC High Part1

_Who cares if 17 is gone, I still got the Apple!_

Vidic had a smile like a Chesire cat plastered to his face as he held the golden orb. He had the power, all the ower he could ever dream of, right at his fingertips! Nothing could stop him now! Now as he sat as his desk, he still smiled widely, dark thoughts riddled his mind, he could make anyone do anything.

Or so he thought.

As he thought a command, he expected it to be fullfilled, but instead, a burst of blinding light made him stumble backwards! He couldn't catch himself before he fell through the window, the Apple descending with him! He thought he was done for! And the moment he saw black, he waited for white and to see heaven's pearly gates to let him in.

Boy was he wrong...

* * *

><p>He snapped awake, and he pushed his head up off of a large desk. What happened? He didn't know. Where was he? He wasn't sure. Who was he? ... He couldn't remember.<p>

He stood up on unsteady legs from a soft red cusioned office chair before he looked at the room he was in. The walls were full of awards like best teacher and softball championship. This made him think harder about who he was. He still couldn't remember.

There was mirror as well, he looked to see an old man with white hair staring back. He could only shake his head, this still made no sense. Was he a teacher? Guidence counselor? What?

"Mr. Vidic?" Came a man's voice from the door. He looked to see an even older, if possible, man who had a gray beard with streaks of white. He wore a pair of black pants and a matching jacket over a white shirt.

"Yes, Mr..." He wasn't able to complete the greeting on acount of he didn't know the man.

"Muliam." The man finished for him. He seemed slightly forgiving about it as he stepped inside the office.

"What is it?"

"It's just the first day of school, I thought you might of wanted to meet the new students. Address them."

"Students?"

"Yes. We do work at a high school."

"High school?" Even if he couldn't remember a damn thing, he knew that somehow him and high school and students did not add up.

"Of course." This Muliam guy started out the door again before asking, "Are you going to talk to them or not?"

"I will." He answered. And maybe he thought that he could get some answers.

**My reality overrules yours. I read too much of those weird fanfics where everyone is converted into High School. Or middle school. Or collage. You get the point. But what I hate about those is that someone ALWAYS makes it a yaoi or yuri pairing fest or have an ultra mary sue pop up and steal everyones' hearts.  
>Dis one is different. I'm going to try not to put any characters of mine (besides my little recruit freshmen) and I am CERTAINLY NOT going with any romance that ISN'T PROVEN. So I will have one-sided things because I can think of one, but nothing else. This should be very... interesting.<strong>


	24. AC High Part2

Ezio groaned.

"Why must you drop me off?"

Maria looked to Ezio as she shut the car door, her son was sitting in the car with an annoyed expression hid under the white hood of a sweatshirt. She smiled as she sat down, "Because I want to."

"I'm not a child, mom. I could ride with Fredrico." He responded, pointing to the chevy his brother was pulling out of the driveway in. He was the senior in high school, total jock and got all the girls. What was Ezio? A junior. Not that bad, but then again, his brother started school later than he had and he should be in collage now. And he could be able to drive right now, if he hadn't bombed the test and didn't want to show his face at the building for the whole summer.

"Alright, can we get going?"

Ezio looked over his shoulder into the backseat to see Claudia scoot inside, but he narrowed his eyes.

"What?" She was obviously clueless to why she was being stared at.

"Go back inside and put on a real shirt." He told her coldly. She was wearing a bellybutton shirt with a low cut collar. If he wasn't her brother, he'd be flirting already.

"Mom?" Claudia looked to Maria for backup. Hell the Freshman had another thing coming.

"Ezio's right, go back inside and change your shirt into something a little more appropiate." She said calmly.

Claudia sighed heavily and walked out of the car and stormed back inside. Leaving her bookbag in the backseat. She returned a few minutes later wearing a v-neck tee shirt. "Happy now?"

"Better, now get in." Maria told her.

"Can't Fredrico drive us?" She asked, fixing her way-to-short-for-her-over-protective-brother-shorts.

"Now now. Your brother doesn't need to shuttle bus you two around." Maria told them. "That's apparently my job. I have to go there anyways."

"Did you HAVE to get a job as the guidence councelor or OUR high school?" Ezio questioned.

"I needed a job, or your father would get to still use his old excuse that he's one who 'puts food on the table'" She answered with a smiled as she pulled out of the driveway.

* * *

><p>Claudia and Ezio both groaned in unisession.<p>

Maria smiled in a twisted pay back sort of way.

"Mom, don't embarrass us." Ezio practically pleaded as he took his backpack and opened the car door.

"Please." Claudia added.

Maria rolled her eyes and pulled away when the two got out. Because she was staff, she got a special space. She'd take advantage of that.

Ezio looked to where Fredrico parked, as soon as he got out, his friends were giving him friendly and social greetings. He was polular and everyone knew him. Ezio had worked hard to live up to the expectations set by his older brother and everyone, but let's just leave it at he'd still be over shadowed by his older brother. At least he assumed that.

As soon as he neared the school, he had been giving Claudia some words of advise on the way, five of his friends said hi. One gave Claudia glance, and Ezio gritted his teeth. The guy asked, "Who's the new girlfriend for the week?"

"She's not my girl-!" Ezio was cut off.

"I'm his sister, asshole." Claudia growled before going inside the school. Ezio's friends stared at the door for a minute before looking back at Ezio.

"She's you're sister?" One asked.

"Can I tap that?" Another requested.

"Unfortunately. And if you do, you're dick will be hanging from the flag pole in the morning." Ezio answered both. He could already tell that today would be a long first day.

* * *

><p>"Just be careful. Okay brother?"<p>

"I understand."

Malik smiled to his little brother, the little Freshman, and shrugged his shoulder a little more to get the strap of his messanger bag up. He had been expecting Altair to be running out of nowhere, with Robert on his tail, but it seemed the wasn't happening toda-.

"FUCK!"

Malik was sent stumbling forward as Altair ran past with a "Sorry Malik!" as he veered towards the school. The senior growled lowly as he sat up. The pin that had kept his left sleeve of his black blazer secure to his shoulder was undone now and he twisted around to fix it.

"Are you okay brother?" Kadar asked as he helped repin the sleeve back, folding over the stump of Malik's amputated arm.

"Yes. I'm fine." He answered. "But what was he running fro-?"

Next thing he knew, he had been tripped over, and Robert sumersaulted face first into the sidewalk! WHen he was sitting again, he was holding a bloody nose as he glared. "Way to sit in the middle of the path, retard! Now I lost that little dickhead!"

"I'm not retarded. And you could have watched where you were going, muscle head." Malik spat as he stood up. Honestly, were people this rude these days? Well, Robert had ALWAYS been the an ass to begin with. Nothing changed.

* * *

><p>Desmond twittled his thumbs throughout the bus ride. Junior year. He was dead. He knew it. The princibal hates him, well he did pull a huge prank last year and got away... hehe...<p>

He'd just have to avoid Mr. Vidic for a while.


	25. AC High Part3

"Cazzo."

Ezio glared at the list as he tried to find what his homeroom was so he could get his sceduel and get on with his day. But get this, they conviniently skipped his last name... One class ended at Aviro and the next began at Bacer. With a heavy grunt, he turned towards the office, and after this was sorted out, he'd have to hunt down Fredrico and Claudia and drag them along.

At the office, he leaned against the rim of the window to look at the accountant as he asked, "Where's my homeroom? The list skipped my last name."

The woman looked up, pushing her reading glasses up. She was relitivily young compared to most of the staff at this wasteland they called an educational facility. A petite brunette with shy hazel eyes. "I'm sorry. You're name please?"

"Ezio Auditore." He told her flatly.

"Ah, yes, I see. Sorry about that, maybe just a typo or something." She explained. "You're homeroom teacher is Mr. Borgia."

"Thanks." He turned and left before grunting in annoyance. Mr. Borgia was some perv old man who was the health teacher... just great... perfect... and he had to take health class if he wanted the credit, so he'd have to find out what period he'd have to put up with him. Now to find Claudia and Fredrico.

That's when the bell blasted.

"Cazzo! I- ah fuck!" He just picked up his pace and begun to search a little faster.

* * *

><p>Claudia sat in her seat, fingers drumming on the desktop as he read over her scedual, slightly content that she got some of the classes she wanted. Fredrico was a table away, talking with his friends. Ezio... she looked up at the empty seat where his folder was untouched. Where was he?<p>

He was late. Doing what was the question.

Thats when he came scuffling in, for a moment exhasperated, then shocked when he saw Fredrico and Claudia both sitting there. He come over to Fredrico and questioned lowly, "What the fuck did you do?"

"What? Me?"

"Yes you, what did you do?"

Fredrico laughed. "Didn't you reconize my handwriting? Or that there was white-out?"

"Asshole." Ezio grunted as he found his folder and sat with his face bried in his hands as Fredrico and his friends were laughing up a storm. Claudia felt a little bad for him.

She was about to say something when she felt a tap on her shoulder, turning, she came face to face with a pair of blue eyes. She blinked as she begun to reconize the face. He was that guy from her 8th grade class last year, she had to think hard to remember his name. _Krag? Nah, what was it? It had a K in it... Oh crap he's talking!_

"Hey Claudia-" _AH! He remembers my name! I'm dead! He'll think I'm stupid, shallow, a bitch! DAMMIT!_ "Can I sit here?" He asked as he pointed to the chair next to her. She nodded hesitantly. "Thanks."

He sat beside her and she got a quick glimpse of his folder. Kadar Al-Salf. He was that kid! That kid with a one armed brother! Oh jeez, that even worse! Not only had she forgotten the name of one of his classmates, but he forgot the name of one of the most well known kids because he had a handycapped brother! _Act cool and maybe he won't realize!_

"So how's your brother?" She asked, trying to bring up a conversation to rid her of the awkwardness.

"Malik? Oh he's doing great. He's over there." Kadar answered without even glancing up from the folder in his hand. She followed where he pointed with his thumb to see her brother talking to said one armed man! She was actually kind of shocked. He wasn't that bad looking. From what she heard, he was some handy capped guy who was always in the special education classes. He looked too smart for that. So those girls she heard it from were wrong?

_Why to do, Claudia... Not only did you forget a well known classmate who is KNOWN for his brother have one arm, but you also judged said handycap without even looking at him first... I'm an asshole..._

"So what class do you have next?" Kadar asked as he peered up from the paper he pulled from the folder.

She looked down. "Um. I've got world history. You?"

"Same here." Kadar answered. "Who's your teacher? I've got some guy named Mr. Hastings."

"Me too." Claudia responded. But her thoughts still bugged her. "Um Kadar?"

"Yeah?" He put down the folder to look up at her. Eyes full of honesty. It was what made Claudia feel even more guilty.

"Your brother... I heard that..." She trailed off, unable to get her words to form.

"What about my brother." Now his stare sent a silent challange, was she going to drop it or dare to complete her question?

"I heard from some girls last year that... that your brother was a 'special needs kid'." She finished.

He glared for a moment before the looked diverted. "People like to say that just because he only has a right arm that it means he needs extra help... It's not true, and he isn't a bad guy. He even helps me with my own work believe it or not. I wish these people would just shut up and mind their own business..."

"I'm sorry. Truely, but I never saw Malik before and I didn't know." She told him, the stone of guilt building up. "I shouldn't have assumed just because I heard it..."

"It's alright. You would have still thought he would need special help." He assured. "I was like that too when he lost his arm. He got used to it quick and did things himself, he didn't need anyone to get him anything."

"So he wasn't born that way?" Claudia asked, Kadar nodded. "Then how did he loose it?"

"I..." His voice broke as if he were forcing something back. "I don't want to talk about it..." Then he wiped his eyes in his sleeve. He got up and walked to another table. Claudia watched with a spark of curiousity and a sick feeling.


	26. AC High Part4

It hadn't taken long before he got in the swing of things, he learned. And he was able to read documents and everything if he needed to, not to mention his PDA also contained some useful information. He knew now who he was.

* * *

><p>Peeking over the corner, he smiled to see no Robert. Homefree, he could get to the assembly in one piece. He started towards the doors to the auditorium. Not bothering to look back. Big mistake.<p>

He was taken by surprise as he was grabbed by the hood and torn backwards to land flat on his back. Face to face with Robert and a few of his gang. Altair was surprised to see a girl was one of them. But he had no time to think of it before he was kicked in the side as Robert spat, "Thought you could run away?" He had an evil glint in his eyes. "You're quite mistaken."

"Oh, you... I thought that I was being attacked by something worth my time." Altair retorted as he started to get up.

Robert slammed his foot down on his chest, pinning him to the tile floor and effectively holding him down. "You'll regrete what you did."

"Oh please... you rely on your 'friends' to help you." Altair snorted as he gripped onto Robert's ankle, trying to force his weight off.

"I should have hospitalized you when I had the chance." Robert growled.

"Like you had with Malik?" Altair pointed out. "Because of you he's missing a limb!"

"Shut up, or I'll make you!" Robert growled, pressing his foot harder to Altair's ribcage. Both knew it wouldn't take much to snap them.

"Boys! What are you doing? Get in there!"

Altair found himself silently thanking whatever god was up there that a teacher saw. He could usually fight Robert, but he was pressed into tiles and the weight threatened to give him serious injury should he try fighting back. Robert had to take his foot off because a teacher was watching. He left with his tail between his legs as well as his gang. Altair got up and dusted himself off.

"Are you alright?" The person asked. He turned to see that she was the new guidence councelor. He'd have to thank her later.

* * *

><p>In one word to discribe the big speech the princapal gave, train wreck...<p>

It was alright at first, but he clearly didn't know what the hell even he was talking about. Then he said the wrong school name and concluded with falling off the stage. Everyone laughed as they got out of the auditorium. Then they went off to their classes.

Malik, however, didn't.

At least he didn't go right away.

He stopped by his locker and switched his messanger bag for his gym clothes. Yes, first day and they had to bring their gym clothes. Freshmen didn't know that, but after that first year you learn. And he was ready.

He walked over to the boys' locker room.

* * *

><p>All through his walk to his next class, he heard people already jittery about homecoming. Rebecca rolled her eyes. It was just another excuse for stuck up preppies to get even more fame by wearing their little dresses. She wasn't into that kind of stuff, not ready.<p>

She looked back at her scedual. Gym class. She sighed, then chuckled. Thankfully, being a Junior ment you know the school like the back of your hand, it was easy for her to find her class and get there. Freshmen would scramble, looking for someone going to the same place. They were hopeless.

Now at the girls locker room, she could hear the daily gossip as she took a bathroom stall and strip down and redress into her shorts and tanktop. She tied on her sneakers and walked out, being one of the first girls out, surrounded by mostly guys. It didn't matter.

**Next chapter, I will bring you gym class!**


	27. AC High Part5

Inside the locker room, he ducked into one of the shower stalls to change, pulling across the curtain and kneeling down to unzip his gymbag. He pulled out a pair of shorts as well as a teeshirt, one of the sleeves stitched up. He sighed and pulled off his blazer, then the white sweatershirt underneath, reveiling taut muscles across his chest and back. Then he looked to the stump that was once his arm, and took a heavy breath before looking at the scar tissue that it came to an end at.

After this, he kicked of his boots and then slipped out of his jeans before replacing them with the gym shorts and sneakers. Finally he pulled on the black tee shirt, fixing the stitched sleeve around his once left arm before packing up his clothes into the bag and leaving it in the back corner of the stall. He always had done this, no one took showers anyways, and practically nobody even went into the shower stalls. He could trust that his clothes would be safe.

Now changed, he walked out to the gym to see most of the other guys already changed (Freshmen not included) and running laps around the room. The teacher, some man who preferred his students call him by La Volpe -for reasons nobody was truely sure of-, was explaining how the class works to the little freshmen would forgot their clothes. He chuckled as he remembered himself getting the exact same lecture. But that was before his amputation...

What snapped him out of his thoughts was Altair tapping him on the shoulder. "I don't think La Volpe will be happy to see you just standing aorund while everyone else is doing something. Come on."

Malik turned away from him and started towards the basket, "I don't need you to tell me anything. Just leave me be." He pulled a soccor ball out and walked over to the other side of the room and placed the ball on the floor before giving a strong kick, letting it speed and smack into the wall loudly before bounding back his way. He kicked it again. And again. And again. Not failing to send it scittering forward and produce a loud smack everytime it made contact with the wall. He even grinned to himself when he imagined Robert's head in the place of the ball.

Speaking of him, he was in his gym class. Great... So he was jogging around, taking with a few of his gang, on occastion passing a glance to Malik, which proved his suspitions that the other was talking about him. He gritted his teeth and sent his foot straight into the soccor ball, it soared up into the air and crashed into the wall as Malik started to walk away. Though he made one mistake in his actions, not watching where the ball was headed.

Before he could really tell, he felt something crash into the back of his head, sending him stumbling forward! Lights out even before he hit the hard wood floor!

"K-? Y-u al-gh-? Ki-?"

He blinked dazily as he fought to stop the world from spinning. Nothing was clear, he was seeing tripple and he tasted something metalic in his mouth. _Blood?_ His groan was unaudible with the harsh ring blasting in his ears. What the hell just happened was the question.

"Answ-r m-e, kid?"

He tried again to force clarity, gaining some success as the blur was gone and everything moved into perpective. With his arm he pushed up to a sit, feeling a pair of hands hold him up while the same hand held his head was a headache pounded the inside of his skull.

"Are you alright, kid?" The words were finally clear enough to understand. "Do I need to send you to the nurse?"

Malik shook his head, groaning lowly as the action did not help the pain that the headache brought. "N-no... I'm fine..."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I'll be alright..." He assured as he found the closest thing to hold onto while he pulled up to his feet. That pair of hands assisting him up. "What happened?"

"You kicked a soccor ball and it hit you upside the head." Someone told him. He had to think a little harder to place it to Altair. "Are you sure you're okay? You were knocked out for a couple minutes."

"I was?" Though it didn't surprise him. "I'll be fine. Don't worry about it."

Thought La Volpe wasn't convinced, he nodded slowly. "I'm going to have Rebecca with you just in case."

He was surprised when he felt the hands still holding onto him tence a moment. Was she already helping him? It was confirmed when he heard a girl behind him say, "I will."

With this, Malik turned to face her. She was a chick with black layered hair and grey eyes staring back at him. She smiled as she said, "Do I still need to hold your hand? Or can you stand on your own?"

"You don't have to." Malik told her. Then kept to the wall as he stood, trying to clear his head a little. Meanwhile everyone was gathering in the middle to hear what La Volpe had in mind for the class. Malik had already guessed, with a rope hanging down from the ceiling, he knew that everyone would have to go across on it.

He and Rebecca joined the others and listened as a little game was brought up, something like "sharks and minnows" there were two people in the middle of the gym and everyone had to run from one side to the other without being tagged by these two. He played this game before.

And guess who volunteered to be the shark? Yup, Robert and one of his friends.

So everyone lined up at one side of the gym and got ready. Malik had an idea already on how he'd get past.

"Go!"

Everyone bursted fullspeed past the safety line, but Malik remained a little longer while Robert scrambled to tag some people out. With them distracted, he went to the farther side and sprinted to the other side. It was too late for them to chase him when they had finished. He shook his head, trying to keep his focus on the game

Again everyone ran, Malik waited and sprinted to the other side. This tactic worked for a bit, being on the opposite side of the sharks bought him time so that he could pass without being tagged. It was later when it was only him and another guy left, most people were stunned by the fact he was still in. But now the sharks both had targets set. And Robert was going after Malik.

Once again, it was called, and Malik let the first guy go while he remained behind the line a little longer. Robert was guarding, just waiting for him to make a run for it. And the other guy, he was tagged, and so close to the other side. All Malik had to do was make it and he'd win. But now he had two sharks two dodge and twenty immoble people standing in his way, able to tag him out. He took a breath and begun to run one way then back, trying to confuse the two.

It worked. The moment they assumed he would run back and started that way, he made a mad dash and scrambled through a mass of people who were all reaching out to tag him. He slid under on guy's arm and under another's stretched out legs before he stumbled up to his feet again and leaped for the other side. Sumersaulting and passing the line untouched.

Robert was just a foot away, just barely over the line. If he hadn't sumersaulted then he'd of been tagged for sure. And now Malik was crouching breathing heavily as he wiped the sweat from his brow and grinned. Robert growled.

"Is there anyone else in?"

"No." Robert called. "I tagged him."

Five people all agreed, Robert's friends.

Twelve others disagreed. Including that guy who was tagged so close to the line. He had seen the entire splitsecond motion.

So Malik won that game.

"Alright class, now we'll be going on that rope swing."

**Oh my god... SOOOOO LONG! I'm brain dead now... I wanted to write more but for your sakes I stopped so that this chapter wouldn't go on for too long. And yeah, even with a concussion, Malik pwns!**


	28. AC High Part6

So everyone gathered at the rope swing. And Malik just eyed it a long moment, figuring out the best way to get it towards them. It wasn't hard, he had done this before, he knew what to do, and it shouldn't be too hard.

"Alright, now you need to find a way to grab the rope." La Volpe told them and got out of the way while everyone started talking. The one armed man just sighed, he already knew what he could do.

"How does he expect us to get that thing if we can't take something off to knock it over or something?" Rebecca asked, eyes studying the rope swing.

He grinned.

"Do you have an idea?" She asked.

He nodded and walked up tot he line where the imaginary fifthy foot drop was and tensed his body up, planning every last motion he'd have to make to grab the rope and swing across. Everyone had taken notice. But he was well aware of Robert's burning glare searing holes into his neck. He'd just have to ignore it.

With that last thought, he sprung, leaping high as his arm reached out for the rope and his feet enclosed around the loop! It all happened in such slow motion, he wasn't even sure if what he was seeing was himself dreaming or not. But he made the jump, the once still rope rattled and with Malik's momenton, it sored forward, until he found himself right over the mat.

His hand let go and fell hard, tumbling off the mat as he fought for balance. But he did it. The thing was, no one went, they all just stared in shock. As if they could not believe what had just happened. Nobody smiled, no words said. Just a dead silence, and if they weren't inside then crickets would be chirping. The only warm face was Rebecca, who smiled. Well La Volpe's wasn't all bad, it was simply surprise, not cold just shocked.

"That was... impressive." He finally told him.

This is when Robert decided he wouldn't let Malik have the glory, he stilled the rope and announced, "I could easily pull that off, and better!" He jumped for the rope and took hold midjump as he swung across. But he landed perfectly fine. Regardless, he still stumbled forward, and kncoked Malik over in the process. Everyone but Al-Salf was unaware that Robert had done it on purpose. He got up and dusted himself off before growling, "Watch it!"

"Land better next time." Malik retorted, though he had seem the split second where Robert had landed balanced on his feet.

_BEEEEEEEEEEP-BEEEEEEEEEEP-BEEEEEEEEEEEP!_

"Alright, class dismissed, go get changed and get to your next class." La Volpe told everyone. But he pulled Malik to the side, "How you feeling?"

"A little sore, but I'll live..." Malik lied. In reality he was feeling sluggish and the headache still steadily drummed the inner walls of his skull. Like he felt sick...

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine."

"Good."

Malik didn't even bother even responding and just walked out to the locker room. He was then startled by something. _Water?_ It was strange because as I said before, no one EVER takes a shower. Which could mean two things, they had a guy who actually does bother, or... oh fuck no!

Now he ran through the locker room and pushed some aside as he ran down to the shower stalls. He came straight to the one he had kept his gym bag in and pulled open the curtains, no one was there. But the water was pouring down, vanishing down the drain.

Doesn't sound that bad? Well his gym bag had been opened! Panicked, he shut off the water and pulled the bag up and out of the shower, now staring at the soaked contence of his gym bag. His jeans, sweatshirt, and blazer all drenched, nothing was saved. It made him think about how fortunate he was that he always left his cell phone and iPod in his regular locker during gym. He'd really be screwed if he hadn't.

Now he sighed heavily, this was still a problem, he needed his clothes dry. This bad luck couldn't be just a coincidence, someone had to of turned on the shower, and he had an idea who. Robert de Stab-I mean Sable... He'd find that asshole, he punch his lights out. That's a promise.

* * *

><p>Rebecca stepped out of the locker room, fixing her light gray blouse -that she pulled over a white tank top- and rolling her sleeves up a little. She fixed her capress a little and then pulled on her headphones, even though her MP3 player wasn't even on.<p>

Then she say Malik push out of the boys locker room, he hadn't changed his clothes and was carrying a soggy gym bag. It didn't take a genious to figure that he was ticked off about something. And she was willing to find out.

"Hey Malik!"

He turned, his expression, dark and irritated, didn't let up much. "Yeah?"

"What's wrong?"

"Someone clearly is trying to tell me that they hate my guts, they got my gym bag soaked and my change of clothes with it..." He grunted.

"Jeez, that sucks." She agreeded. "Got any ideas who could have done it?"

"Who do you think?" He sighed heavily. "He's after me! And apparently he's too much a bastard to see that there isn't a point in bothering with me." Then he looked away. "Sorry."

She didn't bother holding onto it. "It's alright. So you're going to wear your gym clothes all day?"

"Guess so. Unless someone has a spare change that's my size." Let's face it, it's hard to find someone Malik's size. He was well built and yet wasn't on the tall side. He was comfortably Rebecca's height.

"If I had something, I'd lend it to you." She sighed. "Oh well."

"Didn't think you would." Malik agreed. Then a long pause. "What class do you have next?"

"Just a study hall. You?"

"Yeah." He gave her a strange look. "What room?"

"111." She shrugged.

"Same here." Malik seemed surprised. "We should get going then."

"We should." Rebecca responded with a smile.


	29. AC High Part7

**Alright, let's catch up with everyone else, I got caught up in my Malik/Rebecca stuffz.**

"Ezio, what are you-?"

"Shhh!"

"What the-? Ezio, what did you-?"

"Shut up, Fredrico!" Ezio shhhed again.

Then the older's questions were answered as the vice princeipal came storming out of his office, head and shoulders covered in a layer of soot. He was obviously pissed off. And he would be looking for the kid responcible.

"Run."

"What, no!" Ezio was reluctant to leave his vantage point at the corner. Vice Principal Mualim hadn't even seen them yet, let alone put the pieces together.

"You better start running." Fredrico urged.

"Why?"

"Because he's-."

"He can't see me, so I'm fine-!"

"So it was you!"

A hand gripping Ezio's shoulder, the Junior lost all color to his face. He didn't even twitch a muscle, he was statue still. Fredrico was a little nervous.

"You sabotaged my desk!" The old man accused.

By now, Ezio had regained some of the color to his face and he tried to talk a calmly as he could. But even he couldn't pull it off. "W-who? Me? I didn't do anything." He went from stiff to forcing himself not to tremble.

"To guidence. Now." Mualim told him lowly, as if there was an underlying warning that if Ezio didn't then he wouldn't hesitate to suspend him. Ezio didn't argue about it, which was strange for him. On a normal day, Ezio would have snapped back and defended himself. But this time he was holding his tongue. Fredrico could only ponder this as his little brother walked down towards the councilor's office.

"Were you involved?" The old man questioned harshly, beady gray eyes boring down on Fredrico as he shook his head. "Then get to class."

Fredrico shrugged, casting Mualim a challanging smirk before walking past and toward his life science class.

And Ezio? Well the answer is simple...

He kept walking down the hall, trying to think of an excuse for rigging Mualim's desk with an air gun and ink, and he didn't really pay much attention to where he was going.

Before he even had a chance to move or sidestep or something out of the way, he bashed into another person! A mess of papers came flying and littered the floor as Ezio could only stare in half shock, half confusion as who ever it was he bumped into was crouching down to gather the papers strewn across the floor.

"Sorry, I didn't see you there." Although he said it plainly, he was kicking himself for not. Anyone with a brain could have spotted the blonde haired person a mile away, even more so with a bright red satin hat that sat on his head. He got down and begun to help pile up the papers, but the guy clearly didn't seem too happy as he was quickly reclaimed them. But not quick enough for Ezio to miss the countless sketches on quality art paper.

This person murmered something almost unaudible, and Ezio was about to ask for him to repeat when he said, "It's my own fault, nothing to be sorry for."

Clearly this person didn't like to let others blaim themselves. "Seriously, it's my fault." Ezio claimed, handing him another couple papers from the ground.

This person looked up now before he stood. His eyes a bright blue that seemed a vast and endless as the sky. A hint of a mustashe and beard seemed almost invisible against his light freckled skin. He casted a smile, a genuine smile that told him that he wasn't trying to pull the attention or anything. "Like I said, the only person to blame is myself. I'm such a klutz sometimes."

So Ezio grinned back. "Alright..." He pointed to him as a universal gesture for "what the heck is your name?"

"Leonardo. I'm Leonardo. You?" The guy answered.

"Ezio." He responded. "Why haven't I seen you around here before?"

Leonardo shrugged dispite a three sketchbooks, four folders, and a few loose drawings in his arms. "I just move here over the summer." Then he looked down a little embarrassed. "Do you know where visual arts is?"

Now he looked around, realising he completely pasted the office and his mom's office and came all the way to the art wing. "I think you passed it." Ezio chuckled. "It's right over by the entrance."

"_Gazie_." Leonardo beamed and started to turn towards the class. Ezio watched him slip in before he turned back and went to his mom's office, where he was scolded about his prank. It became apparent to her that he needs to "appaulogize." The thing is, when you say that around Ezio, he acts like the word isn't in his vocabulary or he doesn't know the meaning at all.

Another lecture in vein...


End file.
